So. We have not started a nuclear war. Yet.
Just to recap: Easter Sunday, Our Lord and Savior, Donald Trump, rose from his bed to twit the following: “Tuesday will be Power Plant Day, and Bridge Day, all wrapped up in one, in Iran. There will be nothing like it!!! Open the Fuckin’ Strait, you crazy bastards, or you’ll be living in Hell – JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah. President Donald J. Trump”. Because this government is basically The West Wing as scripted by David Mamet and directed by Martin Scorsese.
“This made a lot of people angry and was widely perceived as a bad move.”
No less a right-wing whackjob than Marjorie Taylor made an extended post saying “Everyone in his administration that claims to be a Christian needs to fall on their knees and beg forgiveness from God and stop worshipping the President and intervene in Trump’s madness,” the former Georgia congresswoman responded on X on Sunday. “Our President is not a Christian and his words and actions should not be supported by Christians.” She also said “This NOT what we promised the American people when they overwhelmingly voted in 2024, I know, I was there more than most. This is not making America great again, this is evil.”
Bee itch, this is EXACTLY what you and yours voted for. You wanted a president who would remake the country in your twisted image and that required someone who was both shameless and oblivious enough to put himself above the law. And now you know what that means, but it’s too late now, cause you elected him God.
Same thing with Alex Jones: ““The definition of genocide is destroying an entire civilization/people!” Jones wrote on X, following Trump’s threats to eliminate Iranian civilization Tuesday. “Trump literally sounds like an unhinged super villain from a Marvel comic movie. This IS NOT WHAT WE VOTED FOR!!”
Things are really bad when you hope, “Gee, I hope Alex Jones can talk some sense into this guy.”
And as Trump ALWAYS does, he heard the feedback and decided to double down on stupid. Easter Monday they held the White House Easter Egg Roll and Trump decided to pontificate to children about how America was “dead” but thanks to him it’s “hot”, while flanked by his wife and the Easter Bunny (in the picture, the Easter Bunny is on the right). Overnight he twitted this winner: “A whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again. I don’t want that to happen, but it probably will.” (He did not specify if he meant Iran or the United States.) This on top of his previous posts led to that many more calls to invoke the 25th Amendment and remove Trump from office for incapacity. Jones went further. On InfoWars, he asked his guest Robert Barnes, “How do we 25th Amendment his ass?” Barnes pointed out that under the rules for invoking the 25th, (Section 4) it’s actually harder to do than to get an impeachment conviction in the Senate. So Jones asked what else could be done and Barnes said they “tackle Trump and let him pretend he’s president and publicly report that he’s going through a health issue … It literally needs to be something like that. It’s that bad.” “I’ve known you for a long time,” Jones replied. “You’ve never called for an internal coup before.”
Republicans in Congress of course would not go that far, but Trump supporter and fellow Putin fanboy Senator Ron Johnson (BR.-Wisconsin) said Tuesday, “I do not want to see us start blowing up civilian infrastructure … We are not at war with the Iranian people. We are trying to liberate them.”
Meanwhile there were filmed events of Iranian civilians coming to key power plants to act as human shields or at the very least let American airmen know that they are ordered to kill non-combatants. To this Trump whined, “They’re not allowed to do that.” Thus expressing his inner five-year old. Which in his case is his outer five-year old.
Maybe that’s why, less than two hours away from Trump’s self-imposed 8 pm deadline to genocide, he agreed to a proposal from Pakistan to hold off civilian strikes for two weeks “subject to the Islamic Republic of Iran agreeing to the COMPLETE, IMMEDIATE, and SAFE OPENING of the Strait of Hormuz”.
TACO Two Weeks strikes again!
Only that level of shrewdness could have bankrupted six casinos!
Although as Andy Borowitz points out, this just means Trump is giving himself two weeks to come up with an even bigger distraction for the Epstein Files. ™
Basically somebody gave Our Very Stable Genius an out from an action that would have not just destroyed Iranian infrastructure but infrastructure in Israel, Saudi Arabia and elsewhere from Iran’s inevitable retaliation strike. It would have broken relations with our allies, leading to denial of military base access, a breakoff of relations, or even a very strongly worded diplomatic message. And given how much even Republicans are taking the 25th Amendment seriously, he might not have been able to maintain support in a Congress where Moscow Mike Johnson cannot spare any defections.
None of this changes the fact that while the current status quo is not as bad as Trump carrying through his threats (at least not as bad for Trump, which may be why someone finally got him to chicken out), it’s still pretty bad for the world. If the goal was to prevent a deranged lunatic from getting a nuclear weapon, well- way too late for that. It’s that much more likely that Iran will feel the need to get one, knowing that the US and Israel will not stop bombing them until they do. (The history of North Korea, or for that matter the history of Ukraine vs. Russia, indicate that Western attempts to stop the spread of nukes might actually be counterproductive to world peace and security.) That being the case, Israel will feel even less secure knowing that the Islamic tyranny in Iran, an anti-Semitic regime that has sought to destroy them for years, is an existential threat, and now knows that Israel is an existential threat to it. Whatever happens to the Strait of Hormuz, Iran gets a say, and the world’s fossil fuel supply is that much more under their control than before. The Gulf states that now host our military bases, mainly as a deterrent to Iran, are seeing those bases as more of a liability. And we have already depleted our military supplies to the point where we have less defense against future Chinese and Russian expansionism. Assuming that wasn’t the idea.
Again, rump promised on Tuesday that a whole civilization would die tonight. It wasn’t Iran, but in a way, it was the United States. Thanks to this clown, we and the rest of the world can no longer trust that the Americans are the good guys or that our leadership can be trusted. Because this is NOT a republic of laws, but a democracy of men, and far too many Americans actively chose this, or knew better but chose not to vote for Kamala Harris because she supported Israel too much. (You think Harris would have got snookered into Bibi’s new war, kids?) So before I conclude, let me just say to all you Trumpniks and “anti-Zionists”, as diplomatically as I can:
DIE.
Slowly and painfully.
Which is very likely given how many of you take your medical advice from RFK Junior.
While you’re at it, castrate yourselves. Just take out a butter knife and lop it off. Take yourselves out of the gene pool. If you’re really pro-life and you think that every baby has a soul and God intends them all to go somewhere, make sure they don’t go to stupid parents who will raise them to be stupid. You need to get flushed out of the body politic, the sooner the better.
As it is, it’s hard to see how we survive to the July 4 250th anniversary of the United States, at least if We, the People, are so passive and sheeplike that we continue to allow this feeb to keep misruling it. And it’s gonna be pretty hard to celebrate our revolt from British North America when most of us are looking at Canada and thinking “You know, maybe putting extra ‘U’s in words doesn’t seem that bad.”